christmas, new years, and a resolution or two?

"dude, it's called burnout!" my dear friend informs me as i sit in a beautifully quiet house with nothing but a blanket and new book to crack open.

"oh my goodness, you are soooo right. i am burned out from the business of the season. i need a break. i will read this whole book without guilt. i'll hold off on completing last minute holiday sessions and i will...have a cup of coffee instead! oh, yeah...screw the laundry too!"

"yeah...screw the laundry too!"

i love encouraging and validating kindred spirits who not only support but help mold my i-am-in-dire-need-of-just-being-lazy-and forget-the-housework- frame of mind! you know who you are and i love you more for it!

so, that is my lousy disclaimer for not having blogged in a couple of weeks, but i must confess...it feels good to be back!!

what is it about a new year that makes you want to clean out closets, start a new diet, and set new goals for better and happier living?!

i'm not a resolution maker. mostly, because i tend to break resolutions. sooo, instead of throwing the whole resolution thing out the window...i have decided to informally remind myself of promises and ideas that i want to always live by.

Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life - well, valuable, but small - and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void. - kathleen kelly, You've Got Mail

*i will take this lovely and valuable life and take more risks.

{could mean:

finally, add some life to my kitchen in way of photos and cabinet pulls! or

take a trip with old high school friends and let husband take care of the kids for a few days...without feeling guilty! or expand my business in ways that i have only thought about!}

Don't you just love New York in the fall?- kathleen kelly

*FINALLY, visit new york in the fall!

{okay, maybe two trips in a year is pushing it a little;}

ability is what you're capable of doing. motivation determines what you do. attitude determines how well you do it.

- lou holtz

*continue to eat clean and live a healthier lifestyle! run more for sure!

okay, i feel better, i wrote something down but before i get to far ahead of myself, i want to share some of the amazing holiday we shared together as a family.

i'm not sure if it was the age of the kids or just being home for christmas, but it was AMAZING. every minute of it. every hour of preparing for it. every late night spent wrapping and creating magic for them...it was worth it.

wish i could bottle the last few weeks up and screw open the bottle when i need a little reminding that this what being a parent to little ones is all about. this is what i will dream we could do again and again after they are grown and the magic and mystery of christmas comes in the form of knowing smiles and patient gift opening instead of shock and awe and loud stampeding down the wooded staircase that tell us...

they are up! (and we fly out of bed to catch their faces when they see what santa has brought for them)

and drink it in...we did!!!!

we put the star on the tree...finally!

we baked...

a pumpkin pie for my peyton, 'cause girlfriend apparently loves her some pumpkin pie!

we eagerly ran out to the mailbox each and everyday to find new little christmas greetings and taped them directly to the wall...

and we looked at them over and over again...found new things to love about the cards and faces that graced them! (i took this last week and have since added more...just in case you don't see yours in this photo...trust me, it's on there now!)

thank you, thank you. my holiday wall is on my top five fave things of the year!

we shopped.

and kept secrets...the best kind though!

we hosted christmas eve dinner with a delicious middle eastern prepared by sito and jido...

umo joe and auntie heather came too making it even more special!

we made cookies for santa,

and wrapped gifts...

three families worth of gifts made our living room look like santa really did sneak a visit!

santa came!

Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen. ~Author unknown

i agree, unknown author!

**i was there even though by looking at these photos you wouldn't know it. i went back to see if i could find one with me in...not a one. i need to get better with that.:)

the reindeer food attracted rudolph! he even left tracks...

(which, for the record...i haven't been able to remove off of the driveway yet. peyton keeps asking when the tracks are going to melt. i keep saying, "hmmm, that's weird. i don't know, honey."

christmas breakfast with my new tradition...this new recipe...

citrus cream cheese roll

from cooking light baking mag.

preheat oven 350.

you'll need:

1 25 ounce package of frozen roll dough (target has a good one)

cooking spray

1/4 c butter, melted

1/2 c sweetened dried cranberries (i used craisins)

1 c granulated sugar

2/3c cream cheese, softened

2 tablespoons orange juice

1 large egg

1 tablespoon grated lemon rind

1 tablespoon orange rind

1 c powdered sugar

5 teaspoons fresh lemon juice

thaw rolls according to package (at room temp)

2. spray round cake pan with cooking spray and place 12 rolls in bottom of pan.

3. brush butter over rolls, sprinkle with craisins or dried apricots cover, let rise in a warm place for 30 minutes.

4. combine 1/4c granulated sugar, cream cheese, oj, and egg; beat with mixer until well blended.

pour mixture evenly over rolls. combine 3/4c granulated sugar and rinds and sprinkle this mixture over rolls. cover and let rise for one hour.

5. bake at 350 for 20 minutes. cover with foil and bake an additional 5 min or until rolls are done (it took mine another 15 minutes) be sure center is done. cool for a 10 minutes.

optional: combine powdered sugar and lemon juice. drizzle over rolls.

this is a lot of steps and even though it is supposedly 'light' in calories...this is still a splurge! it is sooooo amazing and gooey and homemade tasting. they remind me of my italian grandmother. not sure why. try 'em one saturday morning when the kids wake you up too early. such a treat and they make the house smell cozy and sweet!

after breakfast, the kids took their little piles of unopened gifts and played with them quietly until it was nap time and then dinner. it was lovely and quiet and just our family and we did things the way we wanted to do them. enjoying each other knowing that the weekend had just begun and we had days left to eat well and love lots.

we hope your holiday was as happy and special as ours was. we are so grateful for the family and friends who were here to be with us on such a wonderful day{s}!!! we love you so much. so much. i thought my heart would burst during our breakfast when beckham entertained us with his dance moves and the whole lot of us stopped and cheered him on in unison. these are the moments that i live for.

ladies, ,my fellow mama's. we are doing it! we are making memories for our babies that they will never forget. we are what makes sugarplums dance in their heads and this fact did not escape me for one minute. i love the roles my husband and i play in what they believe and look forward too. bravo to all the mama's and daddies...it's not about the presents...it is all about the love though!

***

other things that have made us happy in the last month...

soccer! daddy coached beckham's team and co coached peyton's! it wasn't always easy to play early in the morning with a cold front...but they did it. (with only a few meltdowns and lots of scores!)

beckham held his own with the big kids as he was adamant about playing on both his team and his sisters! he earned two medals and couldn't have been more excited. he looks bummed out in the pic, because he didn't score in his last game. he's so competitive.

our girl, on the other hand was in it ONLY for a medal to hang in her room. she could of cared less if she ever scored. she had her eye on the prize and she made it!!! these pics make me want to cry. ladies and gentlemen, we have a proud little girl here!

coach brett saying she was one of the fastest! peyton just beams at him, i love that sweet and proud face.

***

more to share but mostly just happy and feeling blessed to have these little monsters in my life. i love them so much and i just want them to know what amazing little people they are. yes, they drive us CRAZY at times, but we want it that way. as much as i want to keep them with me forever, they are growing up...

for now i'll take the random, ' i love you, mama's!' and kisses and hugs and feel lucky that i still have such young ones in the house.

i will continue to shamelessly document each and every eyelash from month to month.

i will let them eat too many kisses and let them talk me into any number of various little outings (let's go looking for alligators, mommy!).

most important of all my resolutions and ideas to make my days better and more efficient...

i will stare, study and try to memorize each facial expression and smile.

i will relish with everything that i am, that in this moment, my daughter-one-day-teenage-and-then-woman, wants me to say and believe that she looks just like me. just like me and anything less (not even a finger or toe) is not okay...she wants to be like her mama.

this little one whose two front teeth are lose and will soon be gone to reveal a new face, a new smile, a new beginning.

when i force myself to reflect on the ending of of a full year of growing and living, i can only hope that the next year will be as wonderful as the last...

with healthy, happy kids. grateful to have a safe place to lay our heads at night and warm meals to fill us up. it may sound simple, but really...what more could we want?! when i think of the many alternatives. nope. we have everything we need right here. we are blessed.

happy new year.

xoxoxo